I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
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are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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