Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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