So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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