I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize