That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize