I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Randomize
