Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

we dont do blackfin have a good night :)

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(804): View more from Virginia

I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least

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(910): View more from North Carolina

it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'

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(206): View more from Washington

he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(404): View more from Georgia

I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.

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(423): View more from Tennessee

She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"

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(+35): View more from

i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.

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