But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
