Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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