I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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