My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize