Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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