just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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