Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize