you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
