One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
