yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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