its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
