just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize