I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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