there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
