hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
