The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
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