What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
