Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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