Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Randomize
