Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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