Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Randomize
