Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
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