No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
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I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
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Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...