Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Locals Wish Tourists Would Stop Doing These 27 Things
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
25 True Facts That Sound Fake AF
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.