well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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