We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
