Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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