he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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