How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
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Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
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My liver just had a heart attack.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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