he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
