Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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