So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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