come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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