Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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