That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just pee around me
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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