I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
only if we run a train.
done.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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