I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
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