it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
