dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize