We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
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