really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
