Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Randomize
