Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize