I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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