Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
