I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
